Chronicles of a Stiff Nerd

I’m pretty sure that I’m more than ready to move on with my life…. my love life. 4 years have passed since my former gf and I went our separate ways after a one year long distance relationship. As difficult as it is sometimes to let her go completely, I know that I’m going to eventually find someone new that I am interested in and want to date. Moving on could be my ticket to finding out more about where I stand with “R” and if there will be any kind of future between us. This could also be my pathway to being more open about sex with a partner and actually having sex for the first time. When I was dating R, I let my sexual frustration get the best of me as I bottled it up inside of me and didn’t discuss it with her or the topic of sex at all. Moving on will be a nice first step to being more open about my sexuality with other women and I look forward to seeing where this goes in the near future.

p.s. I’m going to sleep in about 19 minutes.

There are times where I worry about the physical being of R because I know that when we finally tie the knot……. she’s in sooooo much trouble.

Maybe if I ask nicely and un-awkwardly. 

Our friendship started way back in kindergarten but I won’t get too much into that because it’s all about how our relationship started in the 8^th grade. My best friend “R” had a crush on me during this time and I didn’t really find out about until my friend James filled me in on what was going on. We both kind of played it off being shy not really knowing where we were as far as being a couple. She did eventually ask me if I would be her date to the 8^th grade dance. We both had a great time at said dance yet we never really established where we were as a couple and left middle school without having any intention of seeing each other again. Fast forward to 2005, Katrina hits and we’re both spread out through the mid-Atlantic or something like that and we have no way of contacting each other. Throughout my the first year of my new high school career, I couldn’t help but wonder where she was and wonder if she was even thinking about me. So two years later I had the bright idea that looking for her on Facebook would be the best and most efficient option. Low and behold, it actually worked and I couldn’t have been any more excited. After talking for a couple of weeks, we decided to actually try out a long distance relationship (let alone our first relationship ever). It worked out pretty well for a year but in 2008, things started to shift into the abyss and we decided to go our separate ways due to the distance between us. So here I am now in 2011 wondering what my next move is going to be as far as finding out where we are in life and if there’s a possible chance of us being together in the near future. I’m not exactly sure on how she feels because I’m too chicken shit to ask her about this at the moment and I don’t know how to approach with this without feeling awkward or forceful about asking.